Why Do I Keep Attracting the Same “Type”?

Oooweeee, ladies this is going to be an interesting one. Are you tired of attracting the same type of guy? Are Tom, Jason, and Brian all the same personality, just a different face? Something’s got to be up. We’ve got to get to the bottom of it, this is the first step.


Okay, first off if you are concerned that you are attracting the same “type” of guy, that means that’s the wrong “type”. If the wrong thing or person keeps coming into your life over and over again, you’ve got to look at what you are doing yourself. What patterns do you have? What insecurities haven’t you healed from? What test have you not passed yet? What obstacle is in your way? Are you still on the same level when God is trying to elevate your mindset in order to bring someone new and different your way? Let’s begin with these questions. These are the questions we have to ask ourselves. We must be very specific because it is through specificity that we are able to pinpoint the root and problem behind what we need to figure out.


Same demon, different face. Is the man that you are attracting treating you as less than what you are worth? Take a look at yourself. Do you, (insert name here), believe that you are valuable? That you have worth greater than the finest rubies and pearls? If you lack the knowledge of this fact for yourself, it becomes easier to allow someone to treat you as such. My aunt once told me that you have to show people how to treat you. That being said, start by not tolerating the things and behaviors that you know are beneath you. You know, the ones that you are NOT deserving of. Lack of self-esteem can be a big reason why you are experiencing a lack of what you deserve from the men you are attracting.


Another thing that could be holding you back is brokenness. When we are broken we tend to depend on others to fix it. I know personally exactly how this process goes. You’re broken, so you attract another broken spirit. Then you begin on that broken person to fix your broken pieces and vice versa. From there you realize this is not possible. You then become hurt. Hurt people, hurt people. Now you are left even more broken than before because you depended on a man to fill your void and heal your hurt and no one can do that other than Jesus. After realizing this is when you become whole ladies. When you are healed and whole you walk different, talk differently. You will start to attract differently. When you are whole you can recognize a half when you see one because you yourself were once one. But when you are half it may not be as easy to spot another person who is half. This is because it is easier for 2 halves to believe that they can complete each other when they come together. However, there is a seam in between those 2 people and a seam can be ripped.


Relationships mirror who we are. They show us the things that we don’t notice or realize about ourselves until it is brought out of us. Do you want to change it? Make a change within yourself. Check your spirit, your intentions. If there’s still no luck, ask God. He can tell you why and show you what to change.


Maybe you just need to open up your eyes. What you really desire could already be in front of you. But you have to be open to accepting what you really deserve that goes beyond your initial physical attraction. Ya never know what awaits you on the other side.


Tell me what you think. Is there a certain “type” that keeps coming your way that you’d like to avoid? What changes do you need to make within to attract to attract what you really desire?


Love and Blessings Ladies,

-Jerica Henderson

IG: @iflyinjuly/@_fierceandfavored_

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